Brave Men S2E32: Stephen Mansfield - Manliness with Mansfield

had a great conversation with Stephen Mansfield recently I want you to hear this because he speaks into some things Brian that are really deep within a heart of men and Stephen Mansfield wrote a book and I look for myself in the book in fact I told him this he wrote a book called Mansfield's book of Manly Men. Yeah yeah I couldn't find myself in it Brian I didn't see you in it either but you know manly men though yeah it was Paul the Apostle and you know guys like that guys who would you know we can't compete with Paul yeah kind of heavyweight guys we can't compete with that that's hard to you know that guy it's kind of like that guy wrote the Bible yeah so what's your as we listen to the interview Paul what's the big takeaway you know the takeaway for me with Stephen Mansfield you know he speaks into the lives of top world leaders I talked to him he and I are friends and we talk occasionally you know once or twice a month and he'll have been to some country and spoken into the life of the president or whatever that kind of deal in and the key thing for Stephen Mansfield is he I believe he makes us larger as men braver he speaks of being a great man and there's something about his spirit Brian it's just that pulls us up let me put that way you know how some people this kind of make you want to be a better man better person and that's Stephen I think this interview is pretty remarkable well we we have a lot of great interviews coming up on the Brave Men podcast and the best way for you to know what's happening is to subscribe to the podcast on any of the platforms it really means a lot to us and it gives us great analytics and reporting as Paul has said in other podcasts so whether you're on Apple or Google or Spotify or any other major platform just click that subscribe button and listen to it and we are always great to have you as listeners on on the podcast yeah I think today on Brave Men you'll hear something that's going to absolutely pivot some things in your life and yeah you know that whole subscription thing is really important because it changes the algorithms the way they put us in front of people there's just no way to get around that you're going to enjoy Stephen Mansfield today on Brave Men it's Brave Men with Paul Lewis Cole wisdom and courage for the journey I'm with Stephen Mansfield Stephen great to see you and great to be with you give me my friend thank you you've written so many books and you've got a blog and you've got webcasts and things on the state of men in fact I'm looking at your book Mansfield's book of Manly Men and I was trying to look for myself I thought I was in chapter five or six I couldn't remember and so nice try buddy yeah but but so you're an upset not only an observer you're a participant in men becoming biblically masculine but man we're in trouble right now we're in the middle of this coronavirus and it feels like stuff's blowing up in men's lives the pressure is magnifying the stuff that was there give me your take where are we at what's going on just you know right now in the middle of this thing well obviously in a national crisis international crisis like this we need men to be all they're made to be and be you know fully fully committed to the to the vision of noble manhood but I'm I'm hearing from a lot of guys you know it's a time of crisis for them in their homes you know this this come what what this crisis does is it compresses our lives it pushes us up against our decisions it pushes us up against our relationships and so it compresses our lives and so I I gotta tell you when it comes to the national level it makes me wish that we had some men that we had trained and discipled on the national scene the guys in DC are a lot about covering their back sides they're a lot about you know you know getting into getting into his little pissy contest with each other yeah and they're not they're not leading well and that's that's left and right I'm not being partisan in saying that right makes me hunger for the kind of men that you and I know men can be but I'll tell you what having been through some pretty tough times myself in my life and I know you have been too you know we're going to get through this we're going to get to the other side the person you're going to be when you come out of the cave is going to be determined by what you brought into the crisis and the disciplines you maintain while you're in the crisis and so that's the real key the men need to know you know that's an interesting picture you're you're talking about coming out of the cave it's if you will it's a David in the cave of a duel and exactly but but the interesting thing is what he carried in was he was pretty messed up he was real jacked up and yet at the same time he had this depth of preparation from the time he was a boy and and so if you will well we're out right now we've it's time to build some depth because we've got coming out of the cave there's going to be a lot of stuff coming out of caves yes yes and we need to be ready for that well the cave didn't transform David it put him in a press that caused the best of what was within him to emerge and that's that's the real key I don't want to be I'm not being negative by saying hey if you weren't ready for this your screw that is not my attitude but I will say that what happens in a in a situation like this where we're in the cave and under the gun is that the good thing seated into us the good things that we've allowed to thrive on our in our souls they emerge so the cave's not going to transform you the cave is going to press you so the best best that's within you emerges wow man that's fantastic okay so then here I am I'm in the cave let me just just stay with that I'm under the gun I'm under the pressure so as as a guy who didn't really necessarily get prepared I'm going to have to fight for who I am right now I mean it's it's Joel 39 it's time for war right yes yes what does a man do what do we do Stephen well the first thing a man's got to do is maybe be sure to not be knocked off balance I teach men to the to direct their lives lead their lives from the control room now for you and me as Christians that means prayer and Bible study and reflecting our line our lives before God but I talk about the control room every man's got to make sure he's in the control room during this time I don't care if you got a dozen kids running around the house I don't care if you're home school in the neighbors kids I don't care if you're having to grow wheat the backyard whatever it is you've got to maintain the control room you've got to lead your life from a place of reflection and prayer and and a calm decision making so make sure you have that time whatever it is late at night on your back porch with a glass of something or first thing in the morning you know on your face before God whatever it is for you make sure you're leading from that that perspective the second yeah so the first thing is you know essentially it as I'm I need to grab my Bible yeah I mean I need to get some stuff in me that's got some depth and strength and it's not going to happen in the 24-7 news cycle no that's absolutely right in fact I'm telling people give time for their soul to heal have to use some days as the Sabbath use maybe only maybe only watch news every other day you know you cannot do 24-7 Fox CNN MSNBC and expect to be in good shape during this thing you've got to feed your soul on on the word of God you've got to feed your soul on some noble examples I just finished reading a book about Teddy Roosevelt got me fired up he's my man which one which one did you read the one about is a voyage down the Amazon oh yeah yeah sure I can't can't it's my Lord yeah okay so good so good so I I do that all the time but especially in crisis I just make sure that my casual reading time you know late at night whatever on the back porch balcony in my case that I'm reading something that inspires me the Churchill Lincoln you know Roosevelt no let me just let me just jump in right there your book on the faith of Abraham Lincoln is fantastic thank you you're sure chill books you've done a couple right I just want to just got published twice and under two different I don't okay so I'm sure you know okay good I feel better because I read one of them and I went wait a minute I looked on your bio and it goes there's a second I don't know you you got to buy the other one too because you're out of I have I read both yeah and I'm paying retail too so there you go baby but the faith of Abraham Lincoln was fantastic and I had just read turnoffs piece on grant yeah it's amazing tome on that and then to read your whole piece on Lincoln wasn't was remarkable thank you thank you absolutely remarkable and so I want to just suggest everybody right now get that and and where's the best place to get that I Amazon's gonna give you the best prize okay yeah Barnes and Noble Amazon just like up Steven Mansfield there'll be a bunch of books that come up Steven with a pH and it's MA and SFIELD Steven Mansfield and grab the book on Lincoln if you can get it on digital so you get it quick start reading it that's the stuff that builds our heart now number two you were going to number two well that's we let's use that as number two you know feed on Noble things cut off the news a little bit you hear in the same things over and over I know it's bad news I'm not suggesting we hide from the reality I believe that men real men true men face the facts but the fact is that you've got to feed your soul and nobler stuff now the second thing is you you you've got to be the culture keeper in your home this is extremely important even if you live even if you live alone you've got to in a sense lead your own soul so people are going to be nervous people are going to be hectic wives are going to be you know frantically trying to make sure they're keeping everybody happy with meals and what have you you've got to be the culture keeper in your home tell stories recount the good news do do devotions you know in I because of my lifestyle I live in two buildings that are basically towers in two different cities and in art and our towers we're going to get together on the roof on Easter and I'm going to tell the Easter story we're going to have the Lord's Supper with people in our building these are the kind of things that you can do but I'm mainly talking about your home even if you're just blocking your house with your wife tell the good news tell the good stories set time set aside time for romance last night by the night you know she cooked an amazing meal we turned off the television we played some quiet music we had a quiet meal we talked about you know we we are not afraid of bad news we'll we'll talk about the the tough things but we just said like this for me about the grandchild and the good things are going to happen and where we're going to travel later this cheer the good things that God's doing that kind of stuff and you know we recounted poetry it had fun yeah it's filled you got to be the culture keeper in your home yes exactly otherwise otherwise a darkness a depression sort of sets in you know as a guy who studies history I can tell you that that I've done a lot of reading about world war two of the great depression how people live that a personal and practical daily level and for many many people when they got to the ends of their lives I'm talking about people who went to the depression as teenagers and then you know when they were 80 90 they finally passed away before they passed away they said you know but throughout all of my life the best moments I had with other human beings in a home was during that hard time wow and it was because in their particular case you know and I remember I remember the way one person spoke pop a whipped out his violin at the end of the day and we all played and sang and we told stories and we had a little family contest and we had a little jar where we're going to put our pennies in and then go buy candy just on Saturday mornings and those little things that seem so small to us because here we are with our Netflix and our high tech homes and all this they were the sweetest moments of those people's lives now they had a lot more money later they had you know more freedom later but the fact is that the way somebody affected the culture of their home literally marked their life forever and that's that's what we all have that's what a man does yeah so negative or positive right now we are marking not only our lives but those around us and those have influence and because you know Plato said most men live unexamined lives yes I think in this culture we live over examined lives the issue now is we live uninitiated lives that's correct we haven't been initiated into manhood and so this is a time to fill your soul and begin to do the process doing the stuff we know we should do right most of us know the right stuff we need to do we just haven't taken time for it no that's absolutely right but just for that fight for your heart there's no question there's no question and it's what it says is in your heart and how that's shaping the culture of your home that makes a difference just for a moment imagine that a guy's got a 10-year-old boy in his house while he's going through this that young man is going to remember this for the rest of his life it will shape his manhood it will shape his sense of his calling as a man he will recount this to his children your grandchildren this is essential everybody's that way just the 10-year-old boys are more impressionable so that's pretty radical and I think the final thing I would say is be be aware you know one of the things we're told to do in scripture is to think from the finish line so to speak you look at things in reverse and so the day is going to come when you're going to step out of the cave the day is going to succumb when new when normal life quote unquote resumes to some degree make plans what are you going to be at that point what are you going to put in place we've learned some lessons from this crisis there were some things I imagine we wish we'd have in our houses or additional income streams or our different relationships or a pantry down in the basement or whatever it was not just practical things but matters of our entire homes then we've all suffered some financial hit so what is it that we can what is it you what plans can you put in place on the on the back again we'll be right back with more of Paul's interview with Stephen Mansfield just a reminder to check out all of our great resources at cmn.men it's always good to remember cmn.men and we've got links to a lot of the great resources available for you from Paul's father Ed Cole to to Paul's books to study guys and some streaming resources you can watch we also love to hear from you here at the podcast drop us an email Paul at cmn.men Paul at cmn.men and Paul reads every email that comes in and we're always anxious to get your feedback and if you have any ideas or things you'd like to see here at the Brave Men podcast please let us know let's get back to Paul's interview with Stephen Mansfield so you look at it here's where I want to be and what do I need to do now yes they're then and I don't want to go dark but I will tell you one quick thing Paul you know Churchill said when the tones of life ring falls refer to the tuning fork of death and I'm gonna tell you something that I do this gonna sound dark I don't mean it to be dark a lot of death is happening in the world we get daily reports of death counts and we can all debate later whether they're accurate or what have you I don't care right now my main point is I'm surrounded by reports of death and scripture says and ecclesiastes death is the destiny of all men and the living should take this to heart I believe it's ecclesiastes seven and there's a good process for a man to go through to consider you know we sometimes say it humorously live it every day is though or your last is one day you're sure to be right the point being let's ponder our deaths let's look at our lives from the edge of the grave let's take this moment when death is surrounding us and not get depressed and go into a dark hole but just say what do I want to have accomplished what do I want to have said how what kind of impact and legacy do I want to have led a left when I when I pass away because we're all having to ponder our deaths right now back that's going to be my Easter message on the roof of our building here in Nashville so all of that to say it's important I think for a man to look at his life to determine to live a more meaningful life of the days ahead and one of the ways to do that according to scripture Churchill at all the great minute history is that we ponder our deaths and think about our lives in that light according to scripture and Churchill that's right baby you know the the great man used to famous men used to sign off their letters momento mori remember death so if I write your letter call I sign it off the momento mori steven mensfield well why would I actually remember death because I wanted to press you and curse your day no because I would they but they believed in that generation that men lived greater lives for having contemplated their deaths and what they would want to have said or what they would want their lives to have left and so it was a way of it it was a way of inspiring you yeah I've often thought about that I've walked through the as you have I love history and I've walked through the old cemeteries and seen what people wrote and you know particularly in days past they would write a little bit about themselves or a little comment would be left and and it would just kind of catch you and oh man I got to live from this time to this time he's been gone 120 years but he left this little note and the one that I love the most actually I think is Ruth Graham Bell and Billy Graham's wife excuse me and and so when she Ruth Bell Graham so when she did her epitaph when she wrote it and she wanted her family this is what you're gonna put on my gravestone and they talked to her about it but she says this is what I want it says end of construction thank you for your patience this is my favorite because that's really what you know I mean think about this Billy Graham's wife she could have said all kinds of things yes but what she consistently thought of was my life is under construction so what I do each day and I'm not saying you can't have a day where you just chill I mean most psychologists would tell you the Bible calls it Sabbath yes psychologists will tell us you know you've got to have some dial back time and I would say for most of us we get easily distracted by headlines yes how do we deal with that stuff because this it's pervasive it's it's there I'm trying to make sure I know what's going on and yet bam here's this stuff Stephen well I think you have to develop systems of the delivery of information that are nonsensational give you the facts I use certain apps and that are called aggregators and so news comes in I can set the categories I can say more of this less of that and so I get the facts without being sensationalized so I know I do a lot of reading of news but most of it is direct from new sources it's direct feeds and so I don't I don't you know I can't believe the way people are talking on the major news networks I can't believe even how some of the experts are talking you know worse than the great depression six million six hundred million people killed all that kind of such crazy and I'm not trying to I'm not trying to play politics or I'm just saying that kind of stuff will will just rifle your soul so what I do is I get up I monitor news sources I have certain alerts set I've asked about the stuff all the time I'll do another six interviews today and in major media and I need to know my stuff but I don't get my news from the cable news networks primarily and I don't get my news from sensationalized newspaper headlines I'm getting it more straight so I look at it okay that's not great news hey there's some good news I'll remember that that kind of thing and then I'm done but I'm not I'm not subjecting my soul to somebody sensationalism you've got the information but you're not obsessed with the headlines yeah I actually my part of my job I've got to know the information if I'm gonna know accurately up the date and memorize it but but then that can be real traumatic to my soul if what I'm memorizing is millions will die run for the hills you know that kind of thing which is which is not true by the way but I've seen headlines almost like that so you have you have to figure out a way to get calm news that's accurate factual and not allow the new services to destroy your soul yeah the man that is over or rankle your piece for that matter you got to maintain your piece so so good now I was I had an office in in Washington DC a number of years ago in my business and I sat with a man his name was Mark Sylgender he was a congressman out of Minnesota and in one day we were talking sitting at a lunch and the man walked by they chatted their kids go to school together but I turned to mark and I said that guy just actually hammered you a last week in the in the news you know and he said well he's a member of the opposite party and he said he had to do that because he's up for a political appointment and in his party and so you had to hammer me he said but we're friends and I said that doesn't make sense to me he said one thing you have to remember is everything in politics is political that's right I never forgot that Steve it's like and so when I watch these things we we have to have a spiritual discernment yes no question about it no question about it you know that's why I'm not by the way in politics I consider myself a teacher I advise a lot of congressmen and senators but but I don't I don't get in the middle of that because I don't want to be in congress and be running for office every two years but you're absolutely right you you've got I the wise man has a bit of a shield going in his life you don't subject yourself to everything happening out there in culture you don't subject yourself to every emotional surge you state you stay calm you know I mean the new testament speaks of infelipians the peace of God ruling that word best really means refereeing the peace of God refereeing over your heart and so I know it sound real zen right now but I actually work to maintain my peace I look I'm a Christian God's got me I'm as George Whittenfield said I am immortal until my work is done I believe that I'm calm I'm called the call to love this woman that I'm married to I'm called love my children God will take care of me I stay in that place now that's not just happy talk that's what I genuinely believe in what my experience is so a lot of hard hard things are going on in the world and I'm not going to be any good to help solve those things if I allow myself to be destroyed by what I hear what I see of the politics and so I I stay calm and I'm by the way I'm in the midst of it I happen to be a national now but as you know I spend most of my year in DC right in the midst of all this yeah right you are you are doing anybody good if you freak out you're not doing anybody any good if you freak out we're seeing a lot of freaking out no question no question and by the way all you know I need to say I don't mean to act like the old man you know wise old man here but most of this was predicted we all we've all been told and I've certainly told the people in my influence you know have some margin in your home have some margin to have have be able to get to a few months with your own money without having to have any income etc this stuff was coming so if we got freaked out when this hit let's look at it and let's be ready for it next time because things like this are going to cycle back again yeah they do it's Y2K it's 1998.com thing it's a 2008 correction in the economy recession exactly 1979 gas lines is 1973 oil and bargoods 19th century Vietnam wards 1964 the draft starts up again all that it's all that and by the way those are all big national things yeah think about how many local things they've been you know two weeks before coronavirus hit we had a tornado in Nashville we have family members who I had family members who have the roofs torn off their homes we were in the middle of helping them get resetting we in coronavirus hit so there are always local versions of this thing you just have to be ready that's what a good man does yeah we had a we had a tornado here we had I didn't mention Katrina I can go right down down the line but you're right a wise man set gets himself ready sets a foundation Stephen thank you for speaking into our lives in this quick hit and with such great wisdom every man needs a shield and and so Stephen Mansfield M.A.N.S F.I.E.L.D. what's your website Stephen Mansfield dot TV just add dot TV to my name and you got it and that's Stephen with a pH Stephen Mansfield dot TV and that's easy to remember that's portable and you can get all the info there Barnes and Noble Amazon whatever you use for books download ebooks all that stuff you've got amazing number of books that will enlarge our soul make us stronger and build resilience in our lives thank you Stephen God bless you now thank you buddy well thanks Paul for that insightful time with Stephen that was really great you know he's one of those men that I could talk to for a few hours in fact the last he and I got on a call a few weeks ago just between the two of us and I kept asking him questions and finally said hey man I gotta go yeah because he's you know one of the things he said today was there's something in every single one of us is men that we desire to solve problems and one of the issues in this coronavirus lock-in thing we're in the middle of and maybe hopefully if you're listening to this a few years later it's all history and it all got solved but in fact is you know this go home and sit down thing and he talked about how that that you know men are not identified that way so it causes us to lose our identity and there's no battle to fight no victory to win I thought Stephen was extremely insightful in that well I I know that my wife told me to go in my corner here recently at the house and get you know give her some space yeah so yeah I think a whole quarantine thing man well I think any of us as as fathers as husbands as men need need you know let's take it all in let's take in all the advice we can yeah none of us are experts I certainly am not and so that's the reason why these interviews that you're bringing us here on the Brave Men podcast have been really great yeah I'm looking forward to hearing from guys when they write to us Paul it's seaman dot men Paul at seaman dot men you actually mentioned that those do come to meet personally and they actually do it's not just one of those things and then of course so we'll respond I'll get one of the guys Bruce or Chris or someone who will respond and take care of any needs that you have I had a guy right the other day from Belgium and he needed some products and materials and so we were able to take care of him through our friends in London so whatever it is prayer requests prayer requests that's a good thing so anyway it was a great great interview with Stephen Mansfield really enjoys Stephen and look forward to spending time with him again we'll have him back on Brave men again and we'll also have him at our global summits in Dallas with those pick up again that would be great we can actually meet together yeah thank you for joining us today for the Brave Men podcast as Paul mentioned drop us a note Paul at seaman dot men it's only a dozen characters so easy to remember Paul at seaman dot men and we will take those and and get you whatever you need so drop us an email and thank you for subscribing as well and all the major podcast platforms for Paul Cole I'm Brian Boyd we'll see you next time on the Brave Men podcast you